Do as I Say, Not What I Do

I Know What to Do
Robin Hoselton

As an aspiring novelist, I’ve read how-to books about writing, signed up for evening classes and correspondent courses, attended a couple of seminars and participated in group critiques. These activities take time, an excellent excuse for not writing.

I’m always appalled when I read about an author who refuses to make changes in his/her work at the request of an agent or publisher.

To any of you who recognize yourself, I address this:

Don’t you know how lucky you are just to HAVE an agent or publisher express any interest whatsoever? Thousands of would-be writers would gladly trade a month’s supply of chocolate to elevate their masterpieces from the status of “No thanks” to “We’ll take a look at it.”

How do you have the audacity to reject changes? Sure, this is your baby, but these people are professionals. They know what they’re doing and they want to make a sale as much as you do. There’s no rocket science here. Do you want your novel published? Then just make the damn changes. What’s so hard about that? Geez!

I’d give my own example to inspire you, but my case is different

Recently I received a letter from my would-be publisher. Eagerly I scanned the contents and noted that he adhered to the traditional critique method. That is, inundate the writer with compliments and praise, then let the axe fall. I skipped the first page of that frou-frou. I know my novel is well written. It’s not THE great American novel but I didn’t intend it to be. It’s what is called “a good beach read”, nothing earthshaking, but an easy to read, fun story. So, I delved right into the crux of the criticism.

Why not add such and such, the letter writer said, to emphasize the time period. Hmm .. well, I suppose I could do that but if the reader didn’t get the time period from the very first page, I may as well hit him over the head with a two by four.

Change this aspect of the character, he suggests. My response: I don’t wanna. I’ve become friends with this character and like him the way he is.

Another of my characters is pregnant. My critiquer wanted to know how much time she spent in the hospital. When the story ends, the baby hasn’t been born, yet. Should I just conclude the publisher was smoking pot while reading or was I that unclear?

Another comment was that a different character had not changed in ten years. That was deliberate. Doesn’t he believe there are people who work the same job year after year and don’t vary from their daily routines?

At any rate, my reviewer’s remarks all focus on my characters. I’m a little defensive. He can pick on me but not the flaws of my family members.

While I decide what to do, I immerse myself in busy work. In the last two days I have re-tiled the bathroom floor, cleaned the carpet, sorted through my wardrobe and reorganized the garage. Anything to avoid novel revision.

Horrors! Have I joined the ranks of those disgusting writers who don’t realize how lucky they are to HAVE an interested agent or publisher?

Tagged editor, frustration, writer